The future isn’t
something that just happens, by default. You create it by the thoughts you
allow and by the actions you take or neglect to take. Your future is in your
hands – make of it what you will. If you are seeking career success then you
need to read this.
Life is always
presenting us with new opportunities. Sometimes we simply don’t notice them because
they come dressed up in work clothes and
don’t appear very inviting. Big mistake. Firstly, remember that the mind – like a
parachute – works best when open. Try to remain open to new possibilities and
opportunities that come your way. So let go of any preconceived ideas, get out
of your own way and allow the process to work.
If you aren’t
experiencing the career success you would like and you feel your life needs
some fine tuning, the place to start is with your core values. Now it is time
to establish exactly what your core
values are. Consider first the values that seem to be present, on the surface
at least, in today’s society : negativity, closed-mindedness, depression, fear,
anxiety, worry, cruelty, hatred, meanness, separation, dishonesty and
hopelessness. They are not a very uplifting set of values and reflect a fearful
and in some ways damaged mindset. There is another way, which is more uplifting
and brings happiness and joy.
Your core values are
your true essence – the authentic, inner you. If you are true to your core
values then your life will feel more whole and complete and you will be happy. At our core we are positive and loving –
negative values are conditioned into us by negative news and events. We have a
choice as to whether we allow life to affect us in this way or whether we will
stay true to our core values and remain positive and loving. Everyone has a
different set of values that they feel are vital to their wellbeing but they
all have a common thread – they make your life more meaningful and fulfilling.
In order to chart a meaningful path through life’s uncertainties it is vital to
be clear about exactly what your
values are.
Select ten of the most
important values from the list below. If you wish to add more, feel free. You
are excavating the very essence of your being so be sure to list everything
that is significant in your life.
Love Security Health Happiness
Financial wealth Adventure Travel Honesty
Power Passion Integrity Success
Freedom Understanding Compassion Trust
Loyalty Creativity Respect Achievement
Acceptance Humour Kindness Independence
Excitement Intimacy Career/work Ambition
Contribution Sincerity Challenge Variety
Conservation Fun Family
Now that you have a
list of the most important values in your life, you need to number them in
priority order and maybe group some together, if that feels right for you. You
now have a personal list that you can use to inform your goal setting and
provide a set of principles to inform your decision making. If you think
compiling the list of your core values and prioritising them was tough – living
your life to their standards is the big test. Remember, this is your personal
list – if you find it isn’t quite right, you can always change it. It has to be
absolutely right for you and reflect
the truth of who you really are.
Armed with a list of
your core values it is often easier to make decisions that affect how you live
your life and how you plan for your future. As you begin to apply your values
to all aspects of your life you may find some conflict. It may be that you work
in a factory that produces disposable cups and Conservation is an important
value to you. There is conflict as you need to earn a living but are working
against one of your principles. Consider ways to bring harmony such as seeking
employment in a company that manufactures something more in keeping with your
values or maybe talk to the management about offsetting the impact the cups
have by planting trees or making them from a more environmentally friendly
material. You see how knowing your values can begin to explain why some areas
of your life are causing internal conflict and can give you the knowledge
needed to make changes that will bring your values and life into harmony.
If you are seeking a
promotion that you know will take you away from home more or require you to
work longer hours, and one of your core values is Family, then you may be self
sabotaging in order to stay true to your values. A good coach (ME?) can help
you to work through any such conflicts to enable a harmonious resolution.
One of my core values
turned out to be security. Knowing this enabled me to understand why aspects of
my life were causing me stress and develop a plan to overcome the issue and restore
the security I need in my life.
Equipped with this
knowledge you can now look at all aspects of your life and find answers to your
questions about how to bring more happiness and harmony into each aspect.
Simply relate your values to each aspect of your life and give them a rating.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how well is each value represented in your
relationships, finances, career and other important aspects of your life. Be
absolutely honest with yourself even if the truth is a little uncomfortable or
inconvenient.
If, knowing your
values, you are still finding it difficult to embrace change because of fear, I
have a little game that may help. If you are afraid of an outcome or set of
events, ask yourself
“What is the worst that
could possibly happen under the circumstances?” List all your ideas. Just
getting them out into the open can help you to see how very unlikely they are
to happen. Then ask yourself
“What would you do if
the worst happened?” You would cope and having thought of some strategies can
take away some of the fear. List all your possible solutions next to each
challenge. Do the solutions fit with your core values? What reaction to the
circumstances would fit with your values? What actions would you take if you
were to be true to your values?
Now ask yourself
“What is the very best
that could possibly happen as a result of taking this action?” Again, list
every possibility you can think of, however unlikely or convoluted it may seem.
Suspend disbelief. Then ask
“How could you make
that wonderful circumstance happen?” List all the possible actions that you
could take, in line with your values, that could lead to the best possible
scenario and pick one to try first.
With your values to
guide you, anything is possible. It is time to let the real, authentic you out.
When challenges arise it is Life nudging you to find a better way and let go of
what isn’t working, however comfortable its familiarity may be. Release the old
to make room for the new.
