Successful People are Optimists
The good news is that optimism can be learnt – it is a choice
It has been shown in studies that the majority of the most successful people are optimists – but if you aren’t a naturally cheery, glass-half-full type of person the good news is that optimism is a choice and can be developed. There are some vital differences in the way successful people approach the adventure called life.
I’m not claiming that they are constantly ‘happy-clappy’, smiley, full of nothing but happy and positive thoughts and living a charmed life. Oh no. They have their share of upsets, knockbacks, problems and failures – but successful people deal with them differently to the majority of people.
Instead of going into full-blown blame mode, becoming depressed and giving in, they look for the lesson in every setback. They know that in every difficulty there is a valuable lesson (it can be priceless) and once they learn the lesson they know that they will tackle similar situations in a new and more successful way.
They know the saying that “when God wants to send you a gift he wraps it up in a problem – the bigger the problem the bigger the gift!” So instead of moaning they get on with searching for what it is they need to know – what should they have done or not done that would have given a different, more ‘successful’ outcome? Successful people know that they aren’t victims of circumstances but the creators of their own lives and so they take responsibility for their outcomes.
So if you currently feel unhappy, anxious or there is an area of your life that is causing you some sort of ‘pain’ and irritation then nature is telling you that something is wrong. Brian Tracy likens it to sitting on a mental tack! Ask yourself:
“What is the lesson? What else? What else? What else?.......” Until you have got to the heart of the issue. The lesson will rarely be revealed on the first questioning – you need to drill deeper – this is where a coach is invaluable as they are paid to push you out of your comfort zone to face the issues that will make a real difference to your life.
Once you are happy that you can identify the lesson or lessons in the difficult situation then start applying the lessons. If you don’t, you will repeat the lesson over and over in different guises until you do.
Another area where successful people think differently and show themselves to be optimists is in the things they habitually think about. It is a sad fact that the majority of the population spend most of their time thinking about what they DON’T want – don’t want to be late, don’t want to be overlooked for promotion – again, don’t want to work with that colleague, don’t want to live in that area, don’t want....... The list is endless.
Successful people, on the other hand, focus more on what they DO want and ask “How can I get it?”– I do want to be punctual or early – what time do I have to set the alarm to achieve that? I do want that job – what do I have to do to get it? What new skills do I need? I want to work with a particular colleague or group – how can I maximise my chances of being picked to work with them? I would like to live in XXX – I wonder how much houses are there and how I might get the money to move there?
Can you see the difference? They focus on what they do want and also (and this is very important) what they could do to achieve it. They accept that they will probably need to take some sort of action in order to get what they want and they are willing to do so.
Successful people also look for the good in every situation. When something doesn’t go as they planned or hoped they don’t blame or get mad – they say “That’s good” or “Thank you” and believe that it really is a good thing. I have personal experience of this. Many years ago I was intending to move abroad. I had chosen the plot where the house I would live in was to be built, I had liaised with the architects and changed the layout on the plans, selected the kitchen, lighting and mentally moved in. Then I was told that rules had changed and it was no longer possible. Was I upset – you bet I was! For a few weeks I felt as if the light had gone out at the end of my tunnel, but I knew deep inside that it was for the best so I got on with life – saying “thank you” quite often (albeit a bit feebly sometimes) and looked for new opportunities. And quite soon those new opportunities appeared. Now I am so very grateful that the plan fell through because I can see how big a mistake it would have been. We aren’t in the celestial ‘flying eye’ and so we can’t see what is coming up ahead causing the ‘problem’ or ‘disaster’. If we could we would find it easier to trust. I am absolutely certain that if I had gone into full depressed, angry, blaming mode the opportunities wouldn’t have come my way because I wouldn’t have been in a place where I could see them.
Successful people also constantly feed their minds with positive, uplifting and life-enhancing experiences and material. They read a lot, they go to new places, try new foods talk with different people. They don’t associate with negative people – they say you are what you eat and this applies equally to what you ‘eat’mentally.
It is said that optimists have unrealistic expectations of success and that they learn more things – they have an unquenchable appetite for knowledge, they try more things – they aren’t afraid to read a different paper, try a new dish on the menu, travel to a new location, move house or take a different route to work, and they persist longer than the average person. So often people quit just before success was about to happen – it is always too soon to quit if it is something you truly want!
Maths is not my best subject but I believe that statistically there is a probability that anything can happen.
Optimists increase the chances of what they want happening by doing more things because the more things you try the higher your chances that one of them will be successful.
If you are getting mad at work because you aren’t getting the promotion or the chances you want then try some of the behaviours of successful people and see what happens. Remember – success leaves tracks – look at the people in your place of work who are successful and work out what they do that is different to you, then try doing it too. Or ask them for advice – most will be only too happy to pass on their tips.
What will you do differently today?
You could contact me at sue@successandimagecoach.co.uk
Or
You could go to www.freepersonalrebrandingbook.co.uk and claim your FREE book "The Ultimate Guide to Personal Rebranding for Professional Females Climbing the Corporare Ladder"
To your success and optimism
Sue C
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