Why are you treating yourself like a second-class citizen?

How are you being treated by other people?

Well?

Dreadfully?

The truth is that you are being treated as well as you allow.

Makes you stop and think, doesn’t it?

If you aren’t currently being treated as fairly, graciously, respectfully and politely as you would like – take a look at the way you treat

a)     Yourself

b)    Others.

The answer is in one of those two or, possibly both.

If you aren’t treating yourself with kindness, courtesy and respect others will pick up on this.

You may now be wondering how they would know how you treat yourself – well there are many outward signs that you may not be aware of.

People pick up on the visible signs first – 55% of people’s first impression of you comes from your visual appearance. So, beginning at the top

·        Is your hair well cut, coloured (if you use colour), clean and well groomed?

·        Is your makeup well applied – not to heavy, but enhancing your natural features?

·        Are your clothes neat, flattering to your body shape, appropriate for your age and position, clean and well maintained?

·        Are your accessories minimal, discreet, appropriate?

·        Are you using the latest technology in mobile phone, iPad, other mobile technology?

·        Are your shoes well maintained, comfortable, appropriate and stylish?

·        Do you carry spare tights/nails/makeup as required?

Do you begin to get the idea? Open your mouth to speak carelessly, do careless work, arrive late or leave early or forget appointments and it is easy to see that you aren’t treating yourself with respect. If you don’t, chances are most other people won’t either.

By your actions or inactions you are silently allowing others to treat you as the second class citizen that you treat yourself.

Onto b). How are you treating others? If you are careless of their feelings, putting them down at every opportunity, gossiping, criticising and moaning then the majority of people will be less than willing to go out of their way to be kind and thoughtful to you. They will, most likely treat you as you treat them, which seems only fair.

What most will fail to realise is that this behaviour, too, is a manifestation of your low self esteem.

Either way, if you don’t appear to feel you are worthy of respect and courtesy others will treat you as you show them by your treatment of yourself.

The answer – should be blindingly obvious by now.

Treat yourself with the love and respect you deserve by taking outrageously good care of yourself and see what happens.

Now I don’t mean go out and buy everything you want, eat and drink what you want and run up a huge bill. No, No, No. Quite the opposite.

To take outrageously good care of yourself you need to ensure you eat a healthy, balanced diet, drink plenty of water, get sufficient sleep for your needs and exercise most days.

Then you need to apply my principles of investment dressing to your shopping – remembering that less is more. Buying only the best you can afford and only what works for you. Take great care of all your clothes and get up in time to ensure your hair, makeup and clothes are as good as possible before you leave the house every morning. No last minute rushing, pulling on anything that comes to hand, hurriedly pulling wet or unwashed hair up into a band and applying makeup en route to work, grabbing a coffee and bun as you fly past the cafe because you didn’t have time for breakfast.

Take care of you bank balance by careful and thoughtful purchases – ask questions before you buy anything.

Have a go at these ideas and let me know what happens.

You know you’re worth it.

Copyright © 2013, Sue Courtney – Success & Image Ltd. All rights reserved.

 

Golden Rules for Getting Ahead by Sue Courtney

I have been proactively working on a set of Golden Rules that, if you conscientiously apply them, will increase your chances of being offered that job of your dreams or that much sought-after promotion. They are the result of personal experience and research and I offer them to you in the hope that they enable you to achieve your desired results.

Basically, for career success, all you need to do is Stand Out From The Crowd.

It is that simple – but not necessarily easy. You need to be totally committed to achieving your career goal and willing to ‘go the extra mile’ in order to be noticed. That having been said, in my experience it doesn’t take a massive amount of extra effort to get noticed.

Read on and I will explain my five rules to enable you to  Stand Out From The Crowd for career success.

Rule#1 Look the part.

 I know I repeat this often – but only because it is vitally important. The first impression people make of you will be visual. If you dress the same as all the others doing your job you will just blend in to the background – and that is not a good thing. Your aim is to be noticed. Your aim is also to be associated in the minds of management as a promotion prospect as soon as they see you each day. My Wardrobe De-Tox sessions are perfect for this. Go to www.successandimagecoach.co.uk/wardrobe-de-tox/   

I remember when I was a supply teac her some years ago. I had been teaching for a few consecutive days and had arrived at work quite early. As I strode purposefully into school I passed a parent of a child from another class who asked me if I was the new head teacher. I explained that I was, in fact, a supply teacher based mainly in year one. She apologised for her  mistake but explained that she had assumed this because I looked so “invincible”! I always dressed smartly in suit or dress and jacket rather than the more casual attire of the permanent staff and so I looked as if I should have been in charge. I had to smile.

Rule #2 Arrive early and leave late.

Try to arrive earlier than the managers several times each week and be sure they realise you have beaten them in – there is no point in arriving early and putting in extra time if nobody notices. And don’t waste your time while you are there – be productive and proactive, getting little and big jobs done, getting organised for the day and looking useful.

Don’t clock watch. Finish off the job you are doing before you even consider leaving and then see if there is something else you could usefully do that would make the following day a little easier – for yourself or a colleague.

Rule #3  Look for ways to add value and help out.

Offer to take on a task to help a colleague out. Make suggestions that might make a task more efficient or quicker to complete.

Spread the love – help others whenever you can, whatever their role in the company. Could you do some small thing to make the cleaner’s job a little quicker, easier or more pleasant? Do you know what interests the top manager so you could pop an article on the subject on his/her desk occasionally?

 

Rule #4  Be cheerful and upbeat

That means no moaning and no gossiping. Look for the good in all people and situations – no matter what there will always be something.

Greet everyone with a smile and a cheery “hello” even if you aren’t feeling cheery. You will be surprised how something this small can change the mood of a section.

Being relentlessly cheerful and positive is a habit that can really make a difference – try it for yourself and see.

Rule #5  Volunteer

Put yourself forward for courses that will enable you to add more value to the company and do your job better – actually ask to be included on them, explaining that it would enable you to do a better job for the company. Constantly upgrade your skills so you can offer more to the company than you currently do – even if it has to be done in your own time and at your own expense, look on it as an investment. If you are serious about getting ahead it will be worth it as you will recoup the expense many times over when you are paid more. I offer seminars and courses based on my unique 3 step MAP system – go to www.successandimagecoach.co.uk for details or email me at sue@successandimagecoach.co.uk to ask about seminars and courses coming up in the next few months.

GET NOTICED as an exemplary employee. If your colleagues are unhappy about your behaviour – well done, you must be doing something right. It shows you are worrying them because you are making them aware of what they should be doing and aren’t. Redouble your efforts and keep striving for your goal. Remember that successful people do what others won’t.

 

The underlying truth of the matter is this – if you are willing to do more than you are currently paid to do, you will eventually be paid to do more than you currently do.

It really does work – I have proved it and so have many of my clients over the years. So get out there and do your thing with style. And please let me know how you get on.

Copyright ©2013, Sue Courtney – Success and Image Ltd. All rights reserved.

Groundhog Life - 7 Top Tips To Transform It

Is your life becoming somewhat repetitive – do the same issues and challenges keep cropping up, over and over? Are you having the same negative conversations and getting the same negative feelings at work every day?

We all experience this at some time, but when it feels as if it is all the time it may indicate that now may be the right time to take stock and do something about it. It is possible to set yourself free from the ‘groundhog life’ – here are my top 7 tips to turn your life around.

1.      The first step is to actually recognise it. Life will keep giving us the same lessons, often in different guises, until we learn the lessons and can move on. So first you need to become aware of the scripts you are repeating, which aren’t serving to increase your happiness and wellbeing. The sooner you do this the better. So have a look at your life and discover the negative scripts you are running, both at home and at work.

2.      Write down the negative scripts that you keep repeating to yourself. Maybe you aren’t happy at work, you have applied for promotions and been unsuccessful and have begun running scripts around “I’ll never get ahead”, “people like me don’t get promotion”, “I’m just not good enough”. Write them all out so you can actually see them. Getting them out in the open and accepting that this is what you are telling yourself is often enough to bring about changes. Take a few weeks to write them all down as you think of them, along with the way the script makes you feel and any associated thoughts and feelings that come up.

3.      Now you need to develop a vision of how you want it to be. You need clarity on what you actually do want before you can move forward. When I work with ambitious, professional ladies I begin with a values exercise to enable them to find out what is important to them right now – what their purpose is. It’s no good making a change if it isn’t the right change. You need to know what you truly want and need in your life before you can decide how you want your life or work situation to be. Once you are clear on your values, write a detailed description of your ideal working day from waking up to going to sleep at the end of the day. Spend time adding to it and making changes until it feels perfect. This is your goal. You can now measure your current situation and progress against this ideal.

4.      Now return to your negative scripts and challenge them. If you are saying “people like me don’t get promotion” challenge this by asking “Where’s the evidence for this?” “Really?” “Never?” On a piece of paper, make two columns – one headed evidence in support and the other evidence against and begin to list all the evidence you can come up with. It probably won’t take long for you to realise that the evidence doesn’t stack up in support of your negative belief.

5.      If you find the evidence does support your negative scripts then ask “what can I do about it?” This will open your mind to possibilities – write them down – all of them, however wacky. You don’t censor the ideas at this stage. By now you should be beginning to believe that you do have choices and options and what you want is possible – if you are prepared to make a few changes.

6.      The next step is to rewrite your negative scripts to make them more positive and supportive. So “people like me don’t get promotion” might become “There are three women who used to do my job and are now in senior management or on the board – if they can do it, so can I”. You are going to have to make a mindset shift for things to change. You might also ask them for tips on how best to gain promotion – I’m sure they will have many stories and will be very willing to share advice with anyone who really wants to listen and learn.

7.      Use your new, positive and empowering scripts to develop a plan of what you will do to make the changes happen. I have already suggested one action. I am sure there will be many more – practical action steps that will move you in the direction of your goal. My luxury, intensive seminars, webinar programmes and personalised programmes all address the issues that may arise with very practical steps to take to get ahead of your competition. It is my passion to help you get the job and lifestyle you want.

So now you have my 7 top tips for regaining control of your life and making each day deliciously different and packed full of potential.

I would love to know how you get on with these top tips, so please email me at sue@successandimagecoach.co.uk with your stories.

If you would like to know more about my services and how I can support you, then email enquiries@successandimagecoach.co.uk

I look forward to hearing from you.

Copyright © 2012, Sue Courtney – Success & Image Ltd. All rights reserved.

How To Get To The Top - Part 1

 

·         More than 50% of graduates in the UK are women

·         Nearly 50% of the workforce in the UK are women

So why are the vast majority of the top jobs held by men?

 

It is widely recognised that businesses perform better with women throughout the company, so what is going wrong?

 

There are several possible scenarios:

·         Is it that recruitment is biased in favour of men?

·         Is the system stacked against women with families?

·         Or do few women aspire to the lifestyles that go with the top jobs?

 

Undoubtedly career success requires hard work and the willingness to make tough choices. Women have to make sure they are the right person, in the right job at the right time – but that isn’t the whole story. As Hilary Devey says

“It may be a little more difficult for a woman than a man so she has to work harder – fact.”

This may be true, but is it right?

 

This situation represents a shocking waste of talent – it is bad for women, bad for business and bad for the economy. The system of promoting from only half of the workforce, as is the case in many companies, is inefficient and is causing the loss of a vast amount of talent from the business sector.

 

Every business knows there is a huge cost associated with recruitment and training so it surely makes sense to retain the skill sets that have cost so much to develop? This has to be basic good business sense.

 

Women bring different life experiences, different perspectives and are often more constructive. This ultimately leads to better decision making. Evidence shows that companies with an equal mix of men and women in leadership positions make better decisions, make a higher return on sales, equity and capital investment.

 

So what can be done?

 

Hilary Devey states that not enough women are coming forward to apply for senior roles. Why is this?

 

It may be that the wording of job advertisements contain gender bias. Words such as “gravitas”, “demanding”, “relentless”, “outstanding” and “exceptional” will all lead to more applications from men. It may also influence the recruiters who may appoint candidates based on unconscious language bias and gender stereotypes.

 

Added to this is the tendency for women to point out the few attributes from a long list that they feel they fall short in and use this to talk themselves out of a job. Men, on the other hand, will often point out the few attributes they are confident in and ignore those they may not possess.

 

It is an issue of confidence.

 

In the UK today, approximately two-thirds of women work at least part time.

Many of these find the challenges of juggling work and family commitments can affect their confidence and their career progression.

 

There comes a point when women have to choose what they want to do with their lives and often, work is an important part of this. However, the reality is that being a mother can slow their progress up the career ladder.

 

More than four in ten mothers with good degrees say they have taken a job for which they are over-qualified in order to secure a part-time working arrangement. Too often they have to sacrifice seniority and pay to achieve a satisfactory work/life balance.

 

There are also the costs of childcare to be factored in to the equation. Childcare in the UK is among the most expensive in the world and many families spend 33% of their annual budget on this. Often it just doesn’t make financial sense for women to return to full-time work after having children.

 

Clearly it is a complex issue. However, there are facts that point to it being cost effective for companies to develop strategies for managing career breaks because it has been demonstrated time and time again that mixed gender teams and departments produce more profit.

What do you think?

Do you have a solution to the issue?

 

More to follow in Part 2.

 

Sue Courtney is an expert in Personal Rebranding for Career Success.

For information about her programmes and events please email her at sue@successandimagecoach.co.uk

Or go to her website at

www.successandimagecoach.co.uk

Free book – “The Ultimate Guide to Personal Rebranding for Professional Females Climbing the Corporate Ladder” can be found at www.freepersonalrebrandingbook.co.uk